Baby Peterson {Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness}

Meet Jeannette and her family. We went to grade school together for a little while before she moved out West. We reconnected after high school on Facebook. I watched as her little family grew from just her and her husband to two handsome boys. Jeannette was due with her third son while I was pregnant with Ian. I remember the kind words she spoke to me after learning about Ian, and how she had had a miscarriage as well. As I was sitting in the waiting room at my OB's office for my 6 week follow up appointment from delivering Ian, I couldn't believe what I saw on my Facebook newsfeed. Jeannette's full term baby was born without a heartbeat. Read her story below:

Hello readers! My journey through conception and motherhood has not been easy but so worth it. I love each one of the sweet spirits the Lord sent to our family. My first pregnancy ended early in miscarriage. We were devastated but hopeful for the future. A season after that pregnancy we conceived our first handsome boy Berick. As he grew into a toddler, we knew he needed a sibling so we started trying again. We believe I had another miscarriage but it was very early on and not confirmed. The next month we were pregnant with our second sweet boy Flynn. He wasn't even a year old before we felt it was time to have another baby. And that leads me to Greyson.

I was due to have Greyson any day. I had anticipated him coming early since Berick and Flynn were early. So with each week that passed I was becoming more and more uncomfortable and ready to meet my 3rd little boy.

I reached 39 weeks and still no baby, but all of my appointments said he was healthy, just comfortable. In the early morning hours of January 27th I got up to use the restroom. I noticed that my baby didn't move at all. This was strange but I tried to brush it off. I ended up going into our living room to see if I could get him to move. I was up for about an hour and still nothing. I tried not to panic and went back to sleep.

Fast forward to around 8 AM. I get up and still haven't felt baby move. I begin to get very worried. I told my husband I was scared and called my doctor's office. They told me to try to eat something sugary and come to the hospital. We dropped my boys off at a dear friend's house and headed in. The drive to the hospital was a long one. We said a prayer before we left but I just had a bad feeling the whole way. I kept trying to get him to move but there was just nothing.

We arrive at the hospital, get checked in, and are given a bed. A nurse comes in to hook me up to monitors. The room is silent as she puts the sensor on my belly...nothing...nothing. She says she can't find the heart beat and went to get an ultrasound machine. She comes back and starts looking with the ultrasound. We see our perfect boy on the screen but where the flicker should be for his heart there is nothing. Then our world stopped.

"I'm so sorry but your baby's heart has stopped. We can give you a moment." They leave and my husband and I let the news sink in. I have never cried so hard in my life. The worse was still to come though.

We made the decision to be induced immediately. I received a blessing from my husband and brother in law and we were sent to labor and delivery. The induction process was long but we had the company of my brother and sister in law to pass the time. My mother and step dad arrived at 11 PM to be with us. I got an epidural so I wouldn't have to feel physical pain. The emotional pain was already so overwhelming. The induction started around 2 PM. Around 12:30 AM on the 28th I felt pressure and it was time to push. I was so incredibly scared. I was excited to see the baby I carried for so long but scared because we knew he would never take a breath.

We asked our loved ones to leave and he was born at 12:39. Greyson Reid Petersen, 8 lbs 2 oz, 21 inches long and perfect. He looked like the perfect combination of our other 2 boys. They laid him on my chest and my heart broke into a thousand pieces. My husband and I wept and held each other. They brought Greyson to a bassinet and Kenyon went with him while I was tended to. I had my mom come in. Although they placed him on me after birth I wasn't able to look at him. It hurt too much.

The nurses and my husband cleaned him up and brought him to me where my heart broke all over again. Everything about him was so perfect. My husband and I couldn't believe he had nothing wrong with him yet he had passed.

Our loved ones came in to hold him and we were given 24 hours with him. I went home that same day. We wanted to hold our boys and kiss their faces. It was a whirl wind until Greyson's funeral. He was buried next to his grandfather.

Not a day goes by that I don't think of my angel. My own heart breaks every time I think of how old he would be now. We were told his cause of death was a cord accident. When he was born it was wrapped tightly around his neck.

I'm grateful for the opportunity to have known him even if for such a brief time in the womb. I'm grateful for how close my husband and I have become since his passing. I'm grateful I have two sweet boys here on earth to care for. And I'm grateful for the day when I get to see Baby Grey again in Heaven.

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Greyson's headstone just came in this week, so Jeannette wanted me to include it here. Isn't it beautiful?