Brayden and Ashley: One Week

How oh how can our babes be one week old already!? I'm pretty sure that that was the fastest week of my life, and I know that the weeks are only going to fly by from here on out. So here's to trying to soak it all up!

Up first is their birth story. We got to the hospital around 5 on February 14th to get prepped for my c--section. I was a pretty nervous to get the spinal, but it really wasn't as bad as the epidural was when I had Madison. I got back to the operating room and Eric joined us. That spinal sure did it's job as I didn't even notice that they had started the procedure.

It wasn't long after that and I heard the wonderful cry of our third baby, Brayden Michael Schackmann, at 7:59 AM. I couldn't wait for them to come put him on my chest. Little man has a tight grip. They said that he grabbed hold of the suction hose on his way out.

One minute later at 8:00 AM Ashley Marie Schackmann was born. Little miss swallowed some amniotic fluid on her way out, so unfortunately I wasn't able to get skin to skin time with her. I'm glad I couldn't see what was happening with her, but Eric said it wasn't that bad. They had to suction out her lungs to get the fluid out. As they were wheeling me out into recovery they did let me see her and put her up to my face for a minute.

As I was in recovery with Brayden, Eric was able to go to the nursey to see Ashley. By this time she was hooked up to IVs and had a CPap machine on to help her breath. I was still unable to go see her, but Eric did go down quite a bit to keep her company. She had the CPap for about 4 hours, and then was moved to a nasal cannula.

I did finally get to get up and go down to the nursery to really meet her, and that's when she officially got her name (we were between two and I wanted to see her before I decided). Holding her was the best thing ever.

Brayden got his first bath in our room on Friday night. He was not a fan ha!

Ashley finally got to come stay in our room around 11:30 on Saturday morning. She was still hooked up to her IV until late that night/early Sunday morning. Seeing her wire free was so great!

Ashley got her first bath in the nursery on Sunday. She also was not a fan of the bath. The two that we've given them at home have also been received with cries and screams from both of them. Let's hope that gets better!

Sunday evening we got a big surprise. The nurse that cared for Madison, Abby Warden, was working, and was able to switch to get to take care of us and Brayden and Ashley that night. We hadn't seen each other since the night Madison was born. It was wonderful catching up with her and getting to have her be a part of the twins' birth story as well.

We were finally able to go home on Monday (which happened to be my 30th birthday!). Leaving that hospital room with these two was such a good feeling. I'm glad I got to spend that evening at home with our little family.

And here's a few more pictures from our hospital stay that I don't want to forget!

The rest of the week at home was so nice getting settled into a routine and figuring out how to be parents. We've had some rough nights, but that was to be expected. We've also had some amazing nights where we felt rested waking up. I'm hoping those nights continue!

In their first week they celebrated their first Valentine's Day, met their grandparents and aunts and uncles, and even met one of their cousins (who looks SO big next to the two of them). We've been soaking in the baby cuddles and continue to be amazed at the two little humans that we created. We also had our first doctor's appointment. Brayden is almost back up to his birth weight of 6 pounds 7 ounces at 6 pounds six ounces on Friday. Ashley is also gaining up to her birth weight of 6 pounds 2 ounces at 6 pounds even. We had our first blowout (by Ashley) and Brayden's first time peeing all over once his diaper came off. I wish I could say it would be the last time for both of those things, but I know that would be a lie.

I have so many more thoughts to write down. Like how their birth has me reflecting on Ian and Madison. Or how I didn't think I could love someone as much as I love them (and their daddy). But I'll save those for another day. For now it's back to some baby cuddles.

Baby #3 & #4: 37 Weeks

Well babies, the time has finally arrived. We meet you TOMORROW. Seriously, when did that happen? We've been waiting for this day for so long, and now that it's finally here, I have so many emotions about all that is about to happen.

In fact, as I'm typing this, one of you is just kicking away and the other is rolling around. It brings me back to the night I wrote my last blog post for your older sister Madison. She too was moving all around as I tried to get my thoughts down to paper ---er computer screen. I think one of the biggest things on my chest tonight is your siblings Madison and Ian.

I think about how different their birth stories were than yours will be. We knew Ian was gone when we went to the hospital to delivery him. And although Maddie was still alive when we arrived at the hospital, by the time she was delivered she was already gone as well. Our emotions on both of those trips to the hospital were of sadness, grief, longing, and anger. But tomorrow. Tomorrow we will feel excitement, joy, happiness, and all things good.

And I can't lie, part of me feels bad that I get to feel all those things with the two of you and I didn't with your siblings. My biggest fear is that once you guys are here, Madison and Ian will slowly move to the back burner. Slowly be forgotten. Slowly become an afterthought in our journey through this crazy life. So when you hear me talk to you about them for the thousandth time in a day, please know that that is why. I don't ever want to forget them, so I'm going to do my best to talk about them as much as I can. I know you guys will be ok with that.

As I sit here thinking about tomorrow, I'm overjoyed with the love I know I'll feel towards you both the moment I see you. But I'm also slightly terrified that as of 7:30 tomorrow morning, your daddy and I's lives will be changed forever. It's no longer just the two of us, but now the four of us. We can't drop everything on a dime and go out to eat with friends. We can't stay up all night enjoying a few too many adult beverages and be able to sleep in as much as we want the next morning. We can't be as frivolous with our extra cash flow (but that won't stop us from travelling, we love that too much!).

Boy oh boy though, I get excited thinking about what we will be able to do. We will get to watch you grow up. We will get to kiss your boo-boos, snuggle up with you, hear your laughter, and mediate your fights. And you get to grow up with a built in best friend. What could be better than that?

Babies, you are so loved, so wanted, and so prayed for. Tomorrow our world will change forever, and yours will start. And we will be here for every step of your journey. Mommy and Daddy love you both forever and ever.

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Whew, and now that I got that off my chest, let's move on to my 37 week update! I honestly can't believe it's finally go time, and we've been busy busy at our house with final preparations for the babies.

We finally got the car seats installed in the van. Eric wanted to wait until we were in the hospital to put them in one day, but I convinced him to do them this week. In a few days there will be precious cargo in those seats!

I did a little pampering on myself last Saturday by getting a pedicure with Ashley. It was so nice to soak my feet and let someone get my toes and feet labor ready. And the conversation was on point as well. Time with my best friends is always a good thing.

This week at work I did lots of last minute things getting ready for my departure. Hopefully they can manage without me there (I totally know they can, but it's still nice to feel like I'm needed ha!).

I made it out to my studio and laid out everything I want to use for babies' newborn pictures! I think I might be crazy for thinking I can do them myself, but I'm gonna try. Luckily Eric knows how to handle my camera so he can help me out. And I'm not putting a time constraint on them and will probably only do a pose or so a day. We'll find out how things go soon!

Wednesday I had my last ultrasound and doctor's appointment. I got to see the babes one last time on the ultrasound screen, and baby boy was even showing off his cute little face! I mean look at those cheeks and lips! They didn't do any weight measurements, but his little heartbeat was at 137 beats per minute.

And while baby girl is usually my show-off, she wasn't really having it that afternoon. She kept her hands up by her face (which totally reminds me of Madison), and her cord was hanging out by her nose the whole ultrasound as well. We got one 3D picture, and I think she looks so ticked off that we are trying to get a picture of her! Her heartbeat came in at 141 beats per minute.

Tonight (Thursday) we are taking care of all the last minute cleaning things- washing all the dishes, doing all the laundry, tidying up around the house, and finishing the last minute packing. And of course getting our house prepped for the 5 degree weather we are expecting tonight. Sometimes I love living in an old house (I hope you could sense the sarcasm in that statement).

And now for some stats and info I don't want to forget!

• I gained a total of 32 pounds.
• My stomach measures 44.5 inches around.
• My belly button did pop out and I also got the dark line down the slightly to the left center of my stomach.
• I got 3 stretch marks on my left hip. 
• Baby's heads were almost always right next to each other and have been on the right side of my body for as long as I can remember.
• Baby boy has always been squished down at the bottom and baby girl has had all the room she's wanted.
• Baby girl loves to cram her head up under my right rib cage making me extremely uncomfortable, especially if she does it while I'm driving.
• Babies really start to get active around 7 in the morning, and they like to move around while I'm singing in the car, especially when it's a song by a male singer.
• I never really had any cravings or anything crazy like that this pregnancy.
• My legs and feet were super swollen for a good few weeks around Christmas and the beginning of the year which got me put on 1/2 day bed rest at work.
• Thankfully the swelling was only bad for about a month or so. I still have some swelling in my thighs and calves, but my ankles are back and I couldn't be happier.
• Keeping babies' genders a secret until my baby shower was the hardest thing to do- but I am glad we did it. Next baby I don't think we will find out at all!
• I took photography sessions until the first week in January, and stopped taking newborns in November. It's been a nice break, but I am ready to get back in to them in a few months. 
• Eric took the most unflattering pictures of me and my belly throughout the entire pregnancy. I do like seeing how my stomach has grown since the beginning, but man oh man some of these photos are BAD. He tells me he's going to make me a photo book of all the pictures, so we will have to see if that actually happens. And then I'm going to hide it so it can never be shown to anyone else. Ever.
• I've been terrified of losing them both since we found out we were pregnant. Pregnancy after loss is one of the most difficult things I've ever experienced. Which I'm sure will soon be replaced by parent after loss. It's hard to be confident when your body has betrayed you so many times. But thanks to an amazing husband and support team I have been able to stay mostly positive this entire journey. I know that once they are here tomorrow there will be a whole new strain of worries, but at least the ones I've been feeling since June will finally be done and over.

Babies, tomorrow all of our lives will be changed forever. And we can't freaking wait. We love you both so much, see you in a few hours!

Baby #3 and #4: 36 Weeks

Another week down and another week closer to meeting our babies! And it's finally February, which means that it's finally baby month!

Week 35 started off with some nice one on one time with Eric. We ordered out, cuddled on the couch, and watched some movies together. It was so nice to get some time alone with just him (yay for a little break in basketball!), as very soon that will be harder and harder to find. And isn't this picture of him cuddling the babies the cutest thing ever?!

And I got one more thing checked off our baby-ready list- our hospital bag is officially packed (minus our last minute toiletries). Now just to get the car seats officially installed and I think we will have everything ready!

Yesterday I had another doctor's appointment. Baby A had a heartbeat of 134, and Baby B had a heartbeat of 132. A is still breech and B is still transverse- no surprise there. Dr. Haller said that everything was looking great- both babies are practicing breathing in there so that's a really good sign. I gained two pounds this week, putting my total gained up to 32 pounds. and at 36 weeks my belly is measuring 44.5 inches across my belly button (which a little guy at school was totally amazed by today because it's sticking out). I got my group B strep swab done, and Dr. Haller answered all my c-section questions.

I'm not going to lie, I'm really nervous about getting a c-section. There's so much unknown to me about a c-section, and the fact that it's major surgery has my stomach in a few knots. But I do feel more comfortable after talking to her about everything that will happen and how things will go down. The goal is to get these babies here safely, and a c-section is going to ensure that for these two.

Last night we also got together with Eric's sisters for our weekly Bachelor date night. I love these nights with them, even if we sometimes do more talking than actually watching the Bachelor (and having to rewind so that we know what's going on).

I'm so excited for another week with these babies and seeing what we can get done this week!